As we grow up there are a litany of skills we are taught in school, and, depending on our home life, another set of skills we are taught at home. Unlike banking or paying taxes or organizing bills, nothing in our lives as young adults forces us to learn this skill as a natural part of adulthood. In fact, we are generally unaware that it is important at all, even though our inability to do it disrupts our lives on a daily basis. This skill is the conscious processing of emotion.
I grew up with a notion, maybe you did too, that people with emotional problems or addictions can't cope with life. When I was buried in panic and alcohol, my "inability to cope with life" was not an actionable thing to improve. I would ask "How can I cope with life better?" The answers were vague and unhelpful, "suck it up." From inside a broken brain and life, I had to figure out what it was that I couldn't cope with. It turned out that it was "feelings."
Feelings are not mental. They are not in our head and we cannot think our way out of them. They are physically effective (occurring within our emotional body and spilling over into the physical and mental). We are skilled at ignoring, repressing, and deadening ourselves to our feelings.
When I realized this, I felt freedom I never had experienced before. If I developed the method to address this issue, I could share it with others and help create a world where I wouldn't feel so anxious.
When turning my attention toward others, I found that 99% of people are struggling with emotion on a moment to moment basis in their lives. After a few years of focused study, the single most destructive issue facing us as a society of individuals, is unprocessed emotion.
Stifled and denied emotions don't go away. They live like swollen infections in our energy body and we are unconsciously trying to relieve that pressure every day of our lives, exhausting ourselves carrying their weight. They become part of a matrix of programming that unconsciously drives our behavior toward sabotage and toxicity. Unprocessed emotion forms the foundation for depression, addiction, anxiety, the inability to trust, and the inability to form healthy relationships.
I began a practice of Consciously Processing Emotion. It sounds simple but it is not easy.
Repressing, denying, and deadening is easy. Embracing discomfort and forcing our mind to surrender its power to a feeling? Not so easy.
It has 5 basic steps: Observing. Feeling. Surrendering. Outlasting. Validating.
I use them daily. Those I mentor use them as often as they can. They can be used for the full myriad of emotional content and it's the only tool I know of that any human being can apply in any area and be guaranteed to see improvement. You can find Vito Mucci online at https://www.patreon.com/VitoMucci